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LIFE STYLE OF MEMONS IN KATHIAWAR

 BY MR. EBRAHIM C. MOOMAL

 

A life of supreme dedication and extreme devotion. A life of utter sacrifice and sheer service. An austere and an ascetic life of simplicity and rigid Islamic adherence. A life where responsibilities were clearly demarcated, the wife kept the house, cooked the meals, laundered the clothes and attended to the children, whilst the husband provided the wherewithal. Discipline was the watchword on both sides. Such was the respect and awe of the husband that he was never addressed by name nor would the name escape the wife’s lips in any conversation either. Divorce was a rarity and unheard of.

 

The upbringing of the children was in rigid conformity of the Islamic Faith. The daughter upon reaching the age of twelve would perforce be precluded from attending school andmadressa. Her tuition thenceforth would be in the hands of the parents and a female tutor who would come and give lessons in the house. Here forays into the outside world were escorted by a male member of the family and in strict purdah (Burkha) except when atending feminine gatherings. Nanima’s muslim Chaader or shawl was never beyond her reach, her beaker of water for ablution was at her beck and call. Her obligatory prayers were predominantly on her mind and like clockwork, performed punctually and peremptorily. It is rightly said that the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world. One could set one’s watch on Hajeepe’s venture to the mosque, his recited them with such melodious Kira’at, that one could listen to these with immeasurable pleasure. He would be called upon to open many a gathering with a rendering of a Recital. He was so versed in Shaariah, that he contributed articles regularly to periodicals such as ‘Taybah’, Kaarvah’, ‘Alif’, and myriad of other publications that abounded in that period. Thus, not only was the knowledge limitless but the application and observance was equally rigid and in conformity.

 

Simplicity, frugality and parsimony were always the watchwards, even the dowry was invariably one of bare essentials viz; kitchen utensils, few pieces of furniture, a sewing machine, oft-times a khatlo for the embroidery of Jari and Baadlo and sometimes also the Jandar or the Ghanti. This latter device is a miniature milling machine for the grinding of grain into flour. It comprises of two equal circular slabs of granite or grinding stones, placed one on top of the other. Each of about 75 cms diameter and 8 cm. thickness. The bottom piece would rest on a wooden platform or a frame, a few centimeters larger in circumference, with a five centimetre ridge to trap the flour in the passage and it would be fitted with four 10 cm. Long legs. The bottom slab would also have a pivot or a spoke five cm. Thick and 10 cm. Long, fixed in the centre. The top slab would be fitted with a handle near the outer edge (circumference) to hold and to rotate the slab. The grain would be drawn into the crevice between the two grinding stones and be pulverised into powder. The powder or the flour would ooze into the little passage on the wooden frame. This then is your Jandar or Ghanti. The girls would sit at it alone or with other girls and take turns at rotating the slab.

 

The games the children played involved no expensive equipment, like Cricket and Baseball bats, Tennis racquets, Genuine Letaher Soccer Balls, Golf Clubs or balls or other costly paraphernalia currently rife in the world. Their recreation were simple games like Hide and Seek, Blindman’s Buff, and such simple pastimes which did not cost a single Paai. Paai was one hundred and ninety-second part of a Rupee. (One Rupee comprised of sixteen Annas, each anna four Paisas and each Paisa three Paisa. Thus one Rupee multiplied by 16x4x3 = 192 Paais and each Paai was a legal tender which would be able to buy some article on the market. A family could survive on Twenty-Five Rupees a month. About 2 (Two) Pounds in British currency then. The rate tday is about Fifty Rupees to the Poind Sterling.

 

The Rupee is now decimalised and is divided into 100 Paisas. It is currently worth plus or minus ten cents of our South African money and in terms of the cost of living in India today, even the Rupee canbuy you practically nothing. So much for the value of money. These days if you gave a beggar anything less than a Rupee, he would decline to accept, as if to say, keep it, you might need it more than I.

 

The girls played on their own and the boys amongst boys. The boys had also their thrills in Gilli-Danda which we refer to as ‘kenekie’ and the slightly costly game of Kite-flying. This involved purchasing crinkle paper, threads and dough for the making of paste which would be laced with fine ground glass, to apply on the thread for kite-fighting. Kite-flying was a favourable sport in many an area in India. Aerial kite contests were waged and great deal of time was spent in fashioning elaborate shapes and sizes of kites. So much for sport and the economical way of life.

 

After all is said and done, one must concede all communities have their stupendous, colossal, gigantic weddings as described above. They live for it, they strive for it and die for it. They go to any lengths, even incur debts, mortgage their houses to make the wedding a memorable one. Each of their wedding cards would invariably begin with Urdu couplet:

 

            “Zahe Kismet, Khooda ne din deekhaya, Shaadmaanika,

              Bahaar Aai hawa, Gulshan Zindigaanika.”

Meaning:

            Allah has so destined and shown us the day of marriage. The season has arrived for a beautiful life-span.

 

The communities were then so inter-woven, so inter-knit that each one tried to reciprocate the other. The list of guests was updated regularly.

 

Apart from the weddings, there were the Muslim Festivals; the two Eids each year, the several ‘Big Nights’ as the Holy nights were referred to, provided an excuse for the distribution of charity. People would gather at the mosques and offer their prayers. After the prayers, the rick in their simple garbs of whate robes or kurthas would spread their shawls and sit outside the mosques with mounds of Rupees heaped on the shawls. The Rupees would be in separate amounts, under different charitable headings, which would be distributed among the poor. The headings, were Zakkat, Lillah, Fitra, Sadqa, Towfa, Nazro-niaaz, Aquiqa, Baria, Khatna, Kisasa, Kaffara and others. There would be a great hullabaloo and everyone would be happy. The month of Ramadan was renowned for charity. The first ten days of Moharram were for mourning and giving of charity. All  these are now memories. Gone are the people and the jubilations. All that remains of the old terrain are dilapidated buildings and some decrepit old souls.

Forgotten, also, is the little game played b the elderly couple, peculiar to that Memon region and who were probably past the age of active romance. I record here merely the words, to jog and stimulate the memories of my contemporaries and for the benefit of later generations;  

            Aako, daako, dahin no daako,

            Dahin dooje, darbaar dooje,

            Waadi maliyo, velo phoot’o,

            Oo-r moo-r, dhatoora no phool,

            Saakar seri, khaand ne khajoor.

It is merely a rigmarole without any significant meaning.

Extract from: “End of the Road”